Saturday, June 27, 2009

Anger, much anger....

I'm trying to remember that my father has a right to be happy too. My mother always told me she wanted him to remarry when she passed away. Forgive me for being selfish about this, but I hate him right now for what he's doing already.

Clarification would help right about now I'm guessing.

I was being a good kid, minding my own business the other day, chillaxing, when I get a call from my father. Now, in recent months the only thing he has called me for is when he needs something from me, usually a ride, or to tell me my mother passed away. This time was a bit different. He opened with a polite "How have you been, what have you been up to, what's going on?" and rather than wait for a full response decided to dive into a lengthy description of how he put his profile up on a singles site and has been in contact with a few different women from around the Northwest. There's one he's pretty excited about I guess, and was more than willing to share all the differences between her and my mother with me. He wants to invite her over here soon to spend time with him. I understand he wants to be happy and he's probably been pretty lonely over the last few years, but really? Why would he want to tell me all of this? Did he expect me to jump for joy? Did he expect me to want to meet the woman? I know he's not so bright when it comes to social behavior, but it's barely been a month. Wouldn't he assume that maybe, just possibly, talking about another woman already might upset me? I think hate is a bit of a strong word to describe how I feel toward my father right now. Mostly anger. A lot of anger. I wanted to ask him politely to shut up and leave me alone but I didn't. I listened to him talk, I listened to him get excited about the possibility, and the entire time I was bawling, quietly. How am I supposed to handle that this soon? Someone tell me please, how am I supposed to respond?

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